Never wanted children

So I have never wanted children. Ever. However, my husband did. We obviously discussed this before we got married & both came more to the middle but I was still terribly indifferent. Like, at best, I was indifferent. I would secretly hope he wouldn’t meet the standards I had given him so we couldn’t move forward or that we wouldn’t be able to become pregnant at all. I had tried therapy but no one could get to what was really going on. No fault of theirs, it’s just a shortcoming of only being able to access certain parts of ourselves. I wanted to work on it because I made a commitment & knew there was more than my mentality was telling me.

I met Heather at a wellness fair and immediately knew she was the type of person I had been looking for. I still cannot explain how or why what she does works but it did. It helped soothe the fear & anger I had within me and I started to have feelings of excitement towards the whole idea.

We got pregnant, very easily & quickly after I got my IUD removed. It was WILD to me how immediately protective I felt knowing how I had felt before.

We unfortunately lost her (we chose to believe it was a girl) at 2mo. It was horrific: physically and emotionally. Heather helped me move forward from that and figure out what I wanted to do with the ultrasound & pregnancy test.

We are still trying & now I’m hoping it will happen!

I bless & thank Heather for her work with me and, even if we don’t ever get pregnant again, allowing me to be open to that experience & feel that unique love